A strange thing happened on the way into the office
My daily commute is neither interesting nor exciting.
However, the other day on my way in there was a blue BMW embedded in the front wall of someone's garden and then when I got into Salford I saw a million Police cars. This is nothing new on my journey takes me through the sites and sounds of Salford but this time the Police cars weren't for real. In fact it was all make believe and the mysterious world of television.
Hundreds of trailers were lined up, outside broadcasting units, catering trailers and thousands of crew members wandering around. I guess it was like an episode of the Bill. Only I don't think they feature inner Manchester in the Bill very often. What with it being full of Cockerneys shouting "Ere, You're Nicked Guv'nor". I making this up as I haven't watched the Bill in the last 1000 years.
Most strangely of all, there is a big circus set up in a field next to my house, and when I drive past I see Zebras grazing it's like living in the plains of Africa. (Do Zebras live in Africa??) I need Stephie my Zoo person to confirm.
Look out for a short girl driving a Bug in the background of forthcoming episodes of the Bill.
Hanging Around Like a Bad Smell
Had a bit of an unpleasant experience at work on Friday. There have been loads of renovations carried out on my building and the contractors were putting down new flooring using an adhesive that smelt like every horrible stinky smell in the world multiplied by 2,000,000. It was more than my dog nose could stand.
Incidentally women should be warned of the side-effect of dog nose as it truly is the most bizarre thing ever; it’s almost like having superhero powers!!
I’d barely got to my desk when I had to rush off to the loos to throw up knocking out half of the ladies in there to get to the cubicle. I took a deep breath and returned to the office and lasted about 25 seconds before I had to make the big dash again. Having returned my breakfast and feeling decidedly queezy I skulked around in the corridor trying to flag the attention of my team mates and it was eventually decided that I should go and help set up for some presentations in a different building away from the grim aroma.
I was able to faff around until almost noon but then my tasks had finished as the presentations were over and I was faced with taking junior back to the stinkbomb office. A member of the elf and safety team had been round and assured everyone that the smell wasn’t toxic harmful or posinous to man and beast and that we should all return to our desks. Deciding not to put Jussi Junior under any more discomfort I grabbed my coat and went home. The weekend starts early!!!!
You have to make the most of these situations as when they come along!
Don't get your hopes up
So much for what I was expecting.
The Paddy McGuinness house viewing scenario was over a million miles from the truth. The real person turned out to be unfamous and what's more was over half an hour late turning up. I'd booted the cats out, tidied up and was sat looking like piffy on a stick.
House viewer finally punts up and spends less that 10 minutes looking round and not heard a peep since. Funnily enough Kevin the teenager hasn't been in touch either.
I don't think this house will ever be sold to anyone aaaarrrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!
